How often have you either felt or actually been defeated? Defeats come in all shapes and sizes – both imagined and realized. We also know people who own a gold medal defeatist attitude and we want to shove them off a cliff. But, then again, our personal and professional defeats give us hives, unless we work with them and conquer them.
Think about the last defeat you had. Did you lose your job? Did you lose a spouse or partner to divorce? Did you lose a client/account? I felt so defeated last week: I hadn’t heard back from a prospect and when I did, he said, “no thanks.” I was almost 100 percent certain that they’d say, “come on board,” but, no! I wanted to drown in white or red wine, but then I knew I’d feel even more defeated the next morning.(But, naturally, I had to have at least a glass or two!)
What are some of your remedies for overcoming small, medium, large, huge or imagined defeats? Brave folks might shove them off as if they were some mosquito on their shoulder, others may think, write about and/or question them and then come up with a solution. Solutions seem “out there” when we need them, but then again, when we find them, or ask someone to help us find them, they are like taking a sip of cool water – so refreshing!
I spoke to my mentee this morning about “growing up.” A long-time friend and fellow speaker used to talk about “shutterings” in our lives: those events that mold character and make us more aware of the frailties in life and our own mortality, the events that we all inevitably go through: death of our parents or other loved ones, loss of any kind, getting fired, moving, etc. When youngster “own” their world and think that everything’s peachy, they haven’t had any shutterings in their lives…but they will, and then they’ll start to mature.
Where do we go when we hit one of myriad bottoms in our personal or professional life? We go right on learning and living. We take the damn situation and shake it, rattle it and curse it, but we also need to thank it for its lessons. Where would we be without all those lessons and all that character building? In some hole with no way of getting out.
I’m coming out of those defeated hours, which actually weren’t really defeats, they were just more keys to my computer life and I can spell more words, write more pithy columns and reach out to more people because of my lessons.
Send me some of your solutions to some of your defeats. You, my fair readers, have also gone to new heights after a few lows, and I salute all of us for wanting to go somewhere more positive after those “defeats.”
Here’s to us!
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